Acts of Faith and Investments of The Heart

woman-reading

Dear Reader,

Yes, I mean you. I owe you an apology. It’s been a little bit since I posted, I know. There have been things I wanted to say. to talk about with you all.

For some reason, when I opened the window to start writing a post, it just wouldn’t come together. I was sick – still feel sort of worn out, as a matter of fact. My 15 year old cat decided to stop eating. He has to be syringe fed soft food with a vitamin enhanced gel mixed in every few hours. This is to keep him from starving himself to death while I try to figure out what’s wrong with him. My son and I are preparing for the inevitable anyway. I will not give up on Orion.  I have faith that these feeding sessions he hates will do him good, even if it is in the short term. Sometimes, these acts of faith are what keep us from going insane.

I also did something I haven’t done for a long time. I worked on my novel.  By that, I mean I put in a good amount of time and made progress.  It occurred to me that I was getting closer to the end and it was time to just knuckle down.  So, I did.  5,000 words in three days. And, when I needed a break from that, I rewrote and edited a completed short story that I’d left to ripen a bit. I like to write when I’m not feeling well. When, I’d get sick as a little girl, my mother would read to me. It was soothing then.  It still is – but instead of the gentle rise and fall of my mother’s voice, it’s the rat tat tat of the keyboard.  The guilt that attends writing when I’m healthy and germ free vanishes when I’m under the weather. Being released from that burden is a miracle on it’s own. It’s a way of being productive without getting worn out, I think. That said, I will not give up on this novel. Or this blog.

Life hands us opportunities to test what we believe in and what we’re willing to invest our hearts into. Sometimes,  the investment of heart and the gift of faith are ill spent. Other times, like feeding your best friend a concoction to help him get better, even though he hates it and you while you’re doing it, is priceless.

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