Bedtime Stories- The Twilight/Fifty Shades Impact on How We (and Our Teens) Think About Relationships

I was wishing for a warmer Halloween that year!

I was wishing for a warmer Halloween that year!

As a little girl, I’d pretend to be Snow White and sing “I’m Wishing” over and over again. Clearly, the dream of a prince finding me and kissing me out of an evil spell was a child’s wish, not a grown woman’s. (Uh,hello? The dude can show up any time. I’ll even pretend to be asleep. I have the best, new lip gloss that’s the perfect red…I’m all ready for him…)
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The Inequality of Leaning Out

Awesome thoughts on the same subject by Terri Webster Schrandt. Love her blog – make sure you check it out!

Second Wind Leisure Perspectives

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Sheryl Sandberg, in her groundbreaking book, Lean In, explores the inequalities of the women-to-men ratios in the workplace in terms of leadership. Women not only face institutional barriers, but a battle from within. Sandberg gave a TEDtalk on how women hold themselves back, literally choosing to watch from the sidelines, and from this, Lean In was born.

In other words, many women did not sit at the main conference table, but instead chose to sit in chairs on the sides. I have done this earlier in my career, feeling slightly unequal to others in the room who had more experience than I. The same phenomenon happens in the classroom in higher education, where women, including myself, either timidly raised their hands to answer a question or did not even try. I knew I had the answer, but I was afraid that it may come out wrong. However the men in…

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It’s Time We Talked About It – Feminism Still Matters Because….

I'm trying, Gloria, I am...

I’m trying, Gloria, I am…

This has underscored my other posts, a quiet theme that finally gets to have it’s own space.  Blame it on a few factors: first, a male friend asked me to take a look at the subject. Second, last night, Reese Witherspoon and Patricia Arquette pushed the subject right under the noses of the viewing public.

So, a little homework first.  Check out the links below, and I’ll be waiting after the cut for you.

This is what we’re talking about and this is where it’s being felt the most.

Then, read this and think about what you say matters and how you vote, America.

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Who cares about beauty? (We’re so much more than that)

Interesting thoughts from a younger woman about beauty and perception. Love it!

Humyn

Source: huffingtonpost.com Source: huffingtonpost.com

While discussing women’s education and why it’s significant, a third grade student said, “Girls need to learn, too. It’s just about our looks. We’re so much more that.”

Smart kid. This is the type of thinking I wish the media would adopt.

From birth, little girls are dressed in frilly pink dresses. The first compliment we hear in life is that we are pretty, cute, precious, sweet, or angelic.

We are taught how to apply make up, and the media pushes their definitions of “beauty” in our faces throughout our entire lives. As girls, and later as women, we are taught that our beauty comes first.

Photography student Hannah Altman, currently attending Point Park University in Pittsburgh, recently did a photo series depicting the dangerous and impossible standards of female beauty. Through photographs of women splattered with glitter to represent blood, tears, and vomit, Altman shows how negatively…

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I’m Not That Girl – All About Being A Late Bloomer And Growing Old Gracefully At The Same Time

Note: New information on Ms. Crawford and the photo referenced in this post can be found here.

This week,a photo of Cindy Crawford hit the media like a tidal wave. The news outlets went out of their way to coo supportive words and her husband made sure to post his own picture of his gorgeous wife. I don’t understand.  If we were all supposed to be horrified by her because she had some stretch marks, I guess we fell short. I for one, was comforted by the picture. So, thanks, Marie Claire for “leaking” it. Continue reading

Simply The Best – Day Seven of Seven Days of Good Men in Movies, On T.V. and in Books

I’m breaking out “Nobody Does It Better” for this post, because the men we are about to meet truly are the best of the best, In my opinion. I already covered Rick Grimes from The Walking Dead, and I don’t want to repeat what I said about him, but since this IS the best of post, know that my perfect man is a combination of all of the men in this post and him. It’s been quite a week, hasn’t it? What started out as a reaction to the frenzy over Fifty Shades of Grey and the dubious Mr. Grey himself has really turned into a celebration of the truly heroic male characters that populate big and small screens, books and comic books.  As fictional as these men are, there are real, important lessons to be learned about what qualities we seek out – either in fantasy or in real life – when we are searching for a person to love.

This is how far we’ve come, so many men…. I bet you’re wondering how I’m going to top the choices we’ve had so far, but I’m going to do my best.

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Hard To Handle – Day Six of Seven Days of Good Men in Movies, On T.V. and in Books

They’re wild.  Rough around the edges. Men that embody the unbridled excitement of the frontier. Idealistic, brave and strong. They’re not bad boys at all. These are men.  And maybe they live hard, but they are about what’s right and good, with no excuses. They may have a bit of a past, but that’s okay. They’ve lived, learned and now have the wisdom that comes with experience.

So, we’ve come pretty far, haven’t we? Starting here, and now, these are tonight’s good men: Continue reading

A Wealth of Wit – Day Five of Seven Days of Good Men in Movies, On TV And In Print

Ah, the power of the spoken word. I think it’s safe to say that most of us find the quick and clever turn of phrase almost irresistible. Combine that with a killer sense of humor and a disarming smile, and that as they say, is that. The trick though, is knowing when the intellect and charm come from a generous and warm hearted soul and not a sociopath, like the odious Mr. Grey. So, I’ve recruited a couple of wonderful examples of the right kind of smooth talkers.

First, in case you need to catch up,  find all the men so far here: Series Page

No one turns a phrase or has been able to write a memorable line like William Shakespeare.  The characters that populate his plays are immortal.  Of all Shakespeare’s leading men, one stands out in my mind as the most witty, the most funny and is my very favorite.. Continue reading

Accidentally In Love – Day Four of Seven Days Of Good Men in Movies, TV and Print

I'm sorry, this still gets me...

I’m sorry, this still gets me…

Lloyd Dobler. He casts a long shadow for such a young man, doesn’t he? This is an iconic romantic movie moment and made a smash hit out of “In Your Eyes” by Peter Gabriel.  Lloyd’s earnestness, his absolute certainty that his place is with Diane Cort, his ease and gentleness with his platonic female friends (!) and the warm, nurturing way he is with his single parent sister and her young son. Oh, Lloyd….we just love you.

Just to catch up, in case you’ve missed any of the previous dream men:

Day One: https://denisedufresne.wordpress.com/2015/02/07/separating-the-boys-from-the-men-day-one-of-seven-days-of-good-men-in-movies-on-tv-and-in-print/

Day Two: https://denisedufresne.wordpress.com/2015/02/08/a-visitor-from-charleston-day-two-of-seven-days-of-good-men-in-movies-tv-and-print/

Day Three: https://denisedufresne.wordpress.com/2015/02/11/a-few-good-men-day-three-of-seven-days-of-good-men-in-movies-tv-and-print/

Young Mr. Dobler is quite a contrast to Mr. Grey, isn’t he? Lloyd is all about feelings, all about being open, honest and giving. It comes as quite a surprise from a teenage boy, doesn’t it? Surprising enough to inspire me to talk about some other surprisingly romantic leading men, unintentionally romantic,even. Continue reading