Do You Believe In Magic? The Thrill and Science Behind Being Kissed (And Often, By Someone Who Knows How)



Poor Lena. We’ve all been there, too.

Being guilty of wishful kissing, she misses the point, doesn’t she? I mean, they’re actors. He’s got to kiss her in a believable way or the romance doesn’t sell. With popular culture full of song titles, book titles, movie titles, and candy named after them, it’s easy to see why people get confused. Nothing is more compelling, powerful and memorable than being kissed.

A great post about Scarlett O’Hara is here, written by williamfrazier2015. Rhett Butler hits the nail on the head though – nothing is better for anyone than being kissed by the proper person, someone who knows how and who you really, really want to kiss you, in the first place. It’s one of the few opportunities you get to have a ‘first’ more than once. And, it’s even one of the even fewer times a ‘first kiss’ is better and more amazing when it’s not strictly the FIRST first kiss.

 I think it’s fair to say that I’ve spent more than my fair share of daydreaming about kissing someone for that tantalizing, perfect first time for quite awhile now.

While the man I daydream about isn’t a cape wearing, superpower driven hero, he is definitely the one I think of during these mushy scenes and after. Sometimes I have to wonder if the people around me would know what’s going on in my head if they happened to look in my direction during my temporary mental vacation.

I’m at the point where I have warped my fragile little mind over it.

Just dreaming about kissing you has...can't wait for the real thing....

Just dreaming about kissing you has…can’t wait for the real thing….

I can assure you that candy does not cut it. All apologies to Hershey and Perugia, and any other candy company out there that named their product after today’s subject. No chocolate candy has ever come close to being as thrilling being kissed by someone I couldn’t get enough of.  Better than the worst kisses I’ve ever received though, so that’s something. And, when compared to nothing at all….well, I’d still rather have the actual lip lock with the subject of my daydreams than candy. (Or kissing anyone else. accepting no substitutes, here… )

As tempting and delicious as it is, this little baci is just a consolation prize…

We all have memories of the very first time we ever kissed someone else, and the first time we kissed someone who became truly significant to us. There are biological reasons why: neurotransmitters, the release of powerful chemicals (dopamine, endorphins) and depending on what study you read, it’s all to help choose a mate with compatible DNA (women) or just to increase the chance of mating at all (men).  Combined, these facts make it a little bit more magical to me. All of that happens in the space of a three minute kiss.The science is pretty neat, but when it comes down to it, does knowing about the ‘man behind the curtain’ matter much when it comes to being locked in someone’s arms, lips passionately joined together?


Clearly, I’ve thought about this quite a bit.

Little girls soak up the message about how important a first kiss can be from early on. Not only can a kiss from the right person cure a boo-boo, it can break an evil enchantment, change a beast or frog into a handsome prince and, save someone from the very brink of death itself.  Every little girl KNOWS it’s not all the words in a wedding ceremony that makes a bride a wife, but is really that transcendent, transformative moment shared with the groom in front of God and everyone.

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Of course, by the time those little girls are teenagers and know better (thanks to ill advised games of spin the bottle and the various ‘frogs’ along the way).a kiss still has the power to render the participants (and sometimes a witness or two) breathless, which can be pretty magical for everyone involved.

Don’t think so?


Now, maybe that didn’t do anything for you, but when I watched the episode where it happened, I actually gasped.

In a “That guy doesn’t thrill me at all, but oh boy do I want someone who does thrill me to kiss me like that!” way.

So bring it, Captain America.  I’m right here waiting.


4 thoughts on “Do You Believe In Magic? The Thrill and Science Behind Being Kissed (And Often, By Someone Who Knows How)

  1. Am I first to reply? HUH? I would have thought the comment section would be swooning with reactions.
    Being kissed? Some guys have to reply as the kisser. Well, I am a kisser. So be ready. I am so infatuated by the movies and the kisses: how kissing has developed from peck to lip to sucking to biting and nibbling to sucking face with engorgement of the other’s lip structures. You have picked some good clips. Pay careful attention to how lips fit together and fit together on another’s. How delightful. Next I shall comment on the small of a woman’s back….


    • The guy I was writing about is definitely a reader of this blog and I know he got the message, so, the lack of commentary after doesn’t matter. Thanks for your thoughts, James!


  2. Kissing is art. The best way to achieve maximum kissatude is to pretend as if you are starved to death before you do it…and if the person you’re kissing has done their job then pretending won’t be necessary.


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